Baby Daddy 15: No Means No

As a father, I have certain responsibilities. As a father of a son, I have the responsibility to guide him toward being a good man. Part of that, is teaching him to respect himself, and other people. Unfortunately, it seems like that latter part is lost in society. We live in a country (America) where the president-elect was quoted as saying that he can go up to women he finds attractive, and grab them by the pussy. And no, I did not censor that. One, I don't believe in censoring my shit. Two, censorship only serves to hide the filth that was stated. With this situation, and the generally pervasive rape culture in much of the world, I wanted to share a story.

My wife told me the other day about a Chinese boy that found pornography on his dad's laptop. The video was a sex tape about a high school boy that started to have sexual relations with a high school girl. The girl was severely intoxicated. As the son started to get excited, and take "interest" in the video, the father flung the door open and said, "See, it is called rape. Did not say 'yes', which means 'no'. It is a crime. Don't do it."

Now, my wife once asked how I was going to explain consent to our son, and I told her that - in my mind - it is simple:

"No" means "no". "Maybe" is not a "yes", no "yes" means "no", "no" means "no". "I don't know", they said 'no' (regardless of spelling), "no" means "no". If they say "yes", and then say "no", "no" means "no". If they are intoxicated (drunk/high/whatever), they can't say "yes", no "yes" means "no", and "no" means "no". They may say "yes", but not remember, and not is related to "no", and "no" means "no". If they say "stop", that means "no", and "no" means "no". 

Disclaimer: If anyone reading this is into kinky shit, substitute a safe-word in for the word "no". And get that shit drafted up in a contract. 

Moral of the Story: "No" means "no", and anything but a sober, sustained "yes" also means "no".