The Farmer and the Wormhole

This is a joke that my wife told. I cannot express how much I love it.

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There once was a guy who decided to go to the farmer's market. When he arrived, he noticed a farmer selling some cabbage. The guy figured he could use some fiber in his diet, and decided to buy some. 

As the guy is inspecting the vegetables, he notices a hole in one of the heads of cabbage. He asks the farmer why there was a hole, and the farmer says it's a wormhole. Because this guy is something of an asshole, he starts condescending to the farmer. The guy tells the farmer that if it were a wormhole, and the guy stuck his finger in it, his finger would be in an alternate reality. 

The farmer sees the guy with his smug, dick-ish face and calmly replies, "When your finger enters the wormhole, the curvature rate will approach infinity. Your finger will absorb an extreme amount of energy, beyond the speed of light, based on the equation: 

t'=t/(1-v²/c²) 

This is derived from the equation for general relativity. You cannot actually measure the position of you finger, after it goes through the wormhole. This is called common sense."

Moral of the Story: Don't be a condescending dick. Also, don't put your shit in a wormhole, because you have no fucking clue where it might end up.