Russia and Celebrity Cats

RUSSIA!!!! I need you to do something that I can poke fun at!! I haven't heard dick from you in weeks! I know you got a depressing-ass country, but what the shit?!

There you go. That was my shout out to Russia. It should also be noted that my friends started getting heavy into Harry Potter. They were already nerds about it, but it got more-so after they bought a Harry Potter board game. Soon after, everyone was trying to figure out what house they would be in. Yes, there's Pottermore. For those who don't know, it is the official (unofficial?) Harry Potter fan site. My friends, however, chose to try a different online test. One of the questions for that test was to identify the animal that we most associate with. Now while some surveys have typical animals (wolf, horse, tiger, etc.), this one had random-ass shit. They had a hawk, a chameleon, a fox, a frog, a flamingo, and a few other critters. Now when I looked at the list, I saw nothing that really "spoke" to me. As a result, I thought I would see what my gut said. As it turns out, my gut is an 80-year-old Russian woman, who kept telling me, "You are strong like bear."

Now why is my inner voice an 80-year-old Russian woman? I have no idea. I also know that I won't question. Old Russians are scary-ass people. Think about it. They lived through Stalin. You have to be hard to do that. I'm hesitant to fuck with Russians in general (except to make fun of the country), but I won't mess at all with an old Russian.

(This portion brought to you by Russia, chief exporter of Vodka, Communism, and the color Grey) 

In other news, my wife has gone full cat-lover. For her birthday, my folks bought my wife the movie Nine Lives. This was a children's movie, starring Kevin Spacey, the focused on cats. The premise is that Kevin Spacey becomes a cat, and needs to learn how to be a better father and husband. What I did not realize, however, is that there are actual, famous cats. I learned this, when my wife began naming each celebrity cat. As it turns out, she follows all of them on Instagram. What's more, she cares more about meeting them than she does meeting human celebrities.

While I thought that alone was....impressive...?....I was not prepared for what I saw yesterday. Yesterday, I got home to find my wife watching YouTube videos. Now this would not normally surprise me. A lot of Chinese shows are on YouTube, so I typically expect to see that on the TV. What I did not expect, however, was that my wife was watching cat videos. What's more, she was watching a Japanese show that is dedicated to cat videos. And on that show, they have Japanese celebrities watching the same clips. That's right. There is a Japanese show that allows people to watch cat videos, and see celebrity reactions to cat videos. I asked my wife why they had it, and she said it was to show that celebrities are "just like us".

Now I want to take a moment and look at this. My wife is a celebrity in China. What's more, she knows others celebrities in China. And despite this, she is excited to know that celebrities are "just like us" and watch cat videos. I'm not sure, but I think that is called irony? All I know is that they showed situations where the cat got pissed off and that shit was funny.

Moral of Story: I am strong like bear.